Secretariat certainly has the pedigree of a winner, but in the annals of sports movies, he’s a donkey.
Saddled with a lame treatment by Randall Wallace.
It’s over-earnest, overly nice given the struggles Penny must have faced – and, in the end, overlong.
It might seem like we’re not all that far down the racetrack to be getting what is essentially a remake of Seabiscuit.
A galloping success.
Despite a decent performance from Lane as the homespun trainer, Secretariat is more blind alley than Blind Side.
It's essentially Seabiscuit for the Watergate years, with extra schmaltz on the side.
With its linear structure, nostalgic glow and distinct lack of surprises, Secretariat seems to have wandered into cinemas after leaving its TV movie hitching post.
The movie is so gurning, rapt and obliviously absurd it’s oddly fun.
It is of course pure hokum but done with sincere professionalism.
Like Secretariat himself, the film is a glossy, big-hearted slow- starter, but lacks his ability to power home ahead of the competition.
What's particularly ridiculous is the way it incorporates all the cheesiest clichés of an underdog story when it's actually a top-dog story.
Film preview: Secretariat--A champion and wonder horse
Secretariat is simply Seabiscuit reconfigured for the Tea Party set
General release. Check local listings for show times.